livejournal. of doom.

brighthibiscus @ 2009-04-24T21:49:00

2009-04-25T01:49:44Z

it's my birthday tomorrow I'll be 19

ISN'T THAT AMAZING

hey my birthday is in two and a half weeks

2009-04-07T07:15:19Z

I feel like I am such a fuckup

To Do:
-get my sleep schedule under control
-be better at managing money
-stop eating so much
-attend class
-figure out what the fuck is going on with my homework
-maintain relationships with friends and family
-and look good doing it

brighthibiscus @ 2009-03-26T12:34:00

2009-03-26T16:35:54Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRQUCBBdgrU

sometimes i love my school

brighthibiscus @ 2009-03-13T03:50:00

2009-03-13T07:50:47Z

I am so hungry oh my god

brighthibiscus @ 2009-03-08T03:21:00

2009-03-08T07:22:01Z

I'm home.

If anyone's around, let's please hang out!!

someone on facebook did it and i am stealing

2009-03-02T01:07:48Z

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? no

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? I cry easy now...my social psych textbook had a picture in it of this Rwandan church where there had been a massacre and I couldn't handle it

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? it's fine

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? turkey!

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? not yet

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? fuck yeah

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? yes

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? yes. I think. I can't tell anymore.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? it depends on my mood

10. Favorite Cereal? cheerios

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? NO

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? pumpkin!!!!!

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? hair

15. RED OR PINK? red. I don't fuck around.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? my lack of self control

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? old friends

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST? not really

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? no shoes. dark blue jeans.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? sea of love-cat power

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? mauvelous! (actually idk I just wanted to write mauvelous)

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? coffee

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? yoshi

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? no one sent it to me I just took it

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? figure skatin'

27. HAIR COLOR? black

28. EYE COLOR? black

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? yes. they are ruining my eyes though.

30. FAVORITE FOOD? sweets. or lamb meat mmmm.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? happy endings

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? crouching tiger hidden dragon lol

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? gray

34. Summer or winter? Summer

35. HUGS OR KISSES? haugs

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? uh. my sister?

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? idk

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? sputnik sweetheart-haruki murakami

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE Pad? my mousepad is a tablet, bitch

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? no tv, only crouching tiger hidden dragon. i did see the latest ep. of 30 rock on the internet though.

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S): regina spektor singing anything

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? the beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? the other side of the world. but that's also kinda home, isn't it. ancestrally. or something. IDK.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? being a champion

46 WHERE WERE U BORN? baltimore

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? i don't really care

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? once upon a dream

"you can't even square things that aren't numbers"

2009-02-28T20:03:29Z

This morning my suitemates came into my room to wake me up.

Me, opening my eyes groggily: "...What does this even mean?"

Then I went back to sleep.

brighthibiscus @ 2009-02-26T02:11:00

2009-02-26T07:13:15Z

Oh my god my eyes hurt so bad
Also they are so red today two people asked me if I was alright
Also I just looked in the mirror I look like I have been smoking pot for like 8 hours
And that I am about to cry blood

(backstory:
so about a month ago I think, my glasses broke.
i tried to fix them many times but it didn't work
so I have taken to wearing contacts instead.
they are not agreeing with me atm.)

brighthibiscus @ 2009-02-16T07:48:00

2009-02-16T12:49:19Z

I'M DRIVIN' THE NIGHT CAR

(apparently that's how you can say "i'm pulling an all-nighter" in Chinese
idk)

brighthibiscus @ 2009-02-15T15:42:00

2009-02-15T20:45:32Z

In lab meeting we read a paper about gaze aversion and how you are better at problem solving when you look somewhere else. Like, instead of looking at the flash card where the problem is written, you'd look at the floor, or ceiling, or wall.

I keep noticing this as I try to write my papers and catch myself staring at the ceiling, or the corner of a table, or some other equally irrelevant and boring area instead of the word document where all the work is taking place. Because when I think, I look in other places.
This also explains why I look like I am staring at dumb things sometimes, because I am actually thinking about something else.

SCIENCE.

brighthibiscus @ 2009-02-04T23:43:00

2009-02-05T04:43:44Z

"there surely are few psychological phenomena more basic than our tendency to like people who like us. Part of the reason we like similar others, then, stems from our basic narcissism."

OH SOCIAL PSYCHOLOGY YOU TELL ME SO MANY THINGS THAT I ALREADY KNOW

try it again, breathing's just a rhythm

2009-02-01T11:43:42Z

10 things that make me sad
1. homework
2. responsibility
3. going to the dining hall and not seeing anyone that I feel like sitting with so then I just find a corner and finish my meal too fast
4. the sun rising when I'm not ready for the day to start
5. when I can tell that people don't really care about or mean the nice things they're saying to me
6. being on the outside, looking in
7. when I see other people's lives going wrong and I can't do anything about it
8. rereading old diary entries
9. people who think that they're better than they are
10. missing people

10 things that make me smile
1. playing the piano
2. reading good books
3. feeling accepted
4. when you wake up in the morning and you're all warm in your blankets and you feel so safe and warm and comfortable and everything is quiet and bright and still you know that you can still sleep another few hours so you do
5. hot chocolate with too much cinnamon in
6. belonging to my culture
7. listening to music and dicking around on my computer at 6:30 in the morning when everyone else is asleep and feeling so insulated and protected from the day
8. bread dipped into soup
9. whenever regina spektor sings anything
10. love

brighthibiscus @ 2008-12-19T17:11:00

2008-12-19T22:11:37Z

first semester is ovaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

brighthibiscus @ 2008-12-05T20:09:00

2008-12-06T01:09:25Z

FUCK EVERYTHING

I still enjoy internetz sirvayz

2008-11-30T17:13:15Z

(from http://www.kabalarians.com/index.cfm)

# Your name of Jinjin gives you a very happy-go-lucky, spontaneous nature.

# You see the humorous side of many situations and can laugh at yourself as well as at others.

# This name gives you a musical, artistic nature and you would do well in any occupation in the entertainment field.

# You have many friends because of your generous, happy nature, but if crossed you have a quick temper, although your annoyance does not last too long.

# You do enjoy an argument and will at times say things just to get others going and then you sit back and enjoy the debate.

# You lack system and order and find it very difficult to budget and save money.

# This name creates a nature that can be the life of the party, but many times you can become involved in emotional situations against your better judgment.

# Your compassionate nature causes you to be too generous and you often give more than you can afford to.

# You are too fond of sugars and starches, thus you could have a weakness in your liver, kidneys, or skin, creating pimples or eczema.

# While this name gives you a wonderful personality, and attracts much love and friendship, it is far too emotional and scattering an influence and will not allow the material accumulation nor personal happiness you should have.

brighthibiscus @ 2008-11-17T07:14:00

2008-11-17T12:16:08Z

Oh god I'm so hungry

and tired

in retrospect drinking so much tea and coffee today probably was an awful idea

also, too bad I tried to go to bed at 2:00 and I couldn't sleep so I got back up at 5:00 and I'm still awake now because I still can't sleep but I'm too tired to actually get any work done so it's not like this was good for me in any way at all
aaaaah fuuuuuuck what's happening

brighthibiscus @ 2008-11-08T03:12:00

2008-11-08T08:13:04Z

who am I

brighthibiscus @ 2008-10-28T23:00:00

2008-10-29T03:03:35Z

ololololol

so today instead of only studying for my chem midterm tomorrow like a good student, I wasted some time re-discovering photoshop.

lol I'm way too excited about this.

(see, the rest of my time I've been drawing on tegaki e, which is so minimalist and doesn't have pen pressure or layers or anything. so photoshop seems really magical to me right now. lol why am I posting this here on my journal I'm such a loser olololol)

lol sorry about that guys

LOL WHAT

2008-10-05T10:22:57Z

I'M AWAKE RIGHT NOW

I HAVEN'T EVEN DONE ANYTHING IN THE LAST 6 HOURS

lololol who wrote this shit

2008-10-01T04:59:35Z

"This hand of mine is burning red!! Its loud roar tells me to grasp victory and to defeat you!!!! ERUPTING BURNING FINGER!!!!!!!!"

brighthibiscus @ 2008-09-16T02:10:00

2008-09-16T06:10:52Z

My Personality:

1. Short
2. Angry

brighthibiscus @ 2008-08-23T18:44:00

2008-08-23T22:44:21Z

brighthibiscus @ 2008-05-13T23:45:00

2008-05-14T03:53:04Z

Well, that's that then. Freshman year is over. I cried a little.

I'd be more reflective but I don't have time atm. Perhaps in a day or so I will pull together a summary of highs and lows of my year, or something, just so that I don't later forget. The big picture is, I liked it, made lots of new friends, learned a shitload of stuff (both academically and socially and psychologically and about myself), it was a good time and I'm glad it happened.
Woo and Yay!

brighthibiscus @ 2008-05-12T16:10:00

2008-05-12T20:11:21Z

freshman year is over. I'm going home tomorrow.

... :( I'm sad.

brighthibiscus @ 2008-05-01T03:31:00

2008-05-01T07:32:41Z

I just watched The Titanic for the first time today.

Didn't cry during it though. I must be some kind of robot!